nikola tosic rules of communication
bellow are the rules how to communicate with me. following these rules will make friendly and business communication much more efficient and therefore our relationship should be more pleasant. these rules are subject to change so check them up from time to time.
my first choice for communication is always email. the last choice for communication is sms. i also chat, phone and physically meet with people a lot.
email is best if you have questions or suggestions. i like to write and discussing things over email gives me time to think. emails are also well documented. please format your emails well and use subjects. i use gmail so please follow the whole gmail conversation thing - do not answer an email about food with a question about credit cards. if possible, do not attach your baners and company branding images in the email.
i appreciate sms only when i can answer with something like yes or no. sms is good for such things as last minute meetings. i do not like to get any kind of important information on sms. asking me questions that require me to write an essay on sms really frustrates me. i do not answer such sms at all. if it is urgent and simple to answer i will sms. otherwise please use email.
i love to text chat but when it comes to concrete stuff i prefer email. text chatting online is a time killer for me, i was never able to brainstorm or achieve any kind of useful goal with text chatting. however i had lots of fun. text chatting is for fun.
voice chatting or phone calling is only for subjects which are not possible to email about, subjects which require me to react to what you are saying. i do not like to brainstorm on voice but if we have no choice it is acceptable and can be useful. i can spend maybe an hour on voice chat or phone discussing stuff. i like to make notes before conversations so we use time more efficiently. i suggest you do the same. voice chatting does not allow multi-tasking, at least i can not do it, so i like to use that time as efficiently as possible.
i like physical meetings. i get much more information about people when i see them in person. i can see them and see their faces. however i do not mind if we never met. never hesitate to ask me to meet up for a drink or a meal. we can combine a light training session like a trail run into a meeting.
most important: i realize some of the things i say or do are provocative. if you do not agree with something please do not damage my property, do not threaten me on the phone, do not raise your voice and do not be aggressive in any other way. i have a very bad reaction to other people’s aggression and this does not help anyone. it will only waste our time and energy. if you want to present your point of view you are welcome. most of my blogs allow commenting and i am also happy to publish the other point of view (if it is not aggressive and mature enough). i am a firm believer in non aggressive debating. if you can calm down and communicate your views politely i will always listen and i can change my mind or even apologize if i made a mistake (yes, i do make mistakes!). please control your temper.
passive aggression is probably the most impractical strategy you can apply. i am an extreme extrovert and i strive on being among people and communicating openly to them. if you ignore me or my feelings it confuses and hurts me. you have to examine what your goals are and re-evaluate your passive aggressive strategy. if we are doing business or we are friends than this helps neither. i understand that some of you have passive aggression coded in your genes and you can not help it. it is still useful that when you cool down you do keep in mind that passive aggression is very impractical and that i will be waiting to discuss the issue directly.
in my life i heard people say “i do not have time” about gazillion times. i never believed it. not even once. so please do not tell me you do not have time to do something. you can always find time if you want to. i will appreciate you much more if you say that you do not want to do something.
i do not like to repeat myself. weather you are paying me million dollars, or i am doing pro bono work, or if we are best friends for 100 years, please do not make me repeat myself. i try to be as precise as i can. if i was not clear that is another kind of a problem and of course you should tell me, but if you keep asking me the same question over and over again because you did not pay attention, and i keep answering it than you obviously do not have much respect for my time and do not be surprised that i just stop answering your questions. i am not an important person but i am the most important to myself, so please do not take me for granted.
here is a list of things not to do:
- do not sms me abstract questions or any information that needs to be documented,
- do not insist on voice chat unless it is necessary,
- do not text chat me project todo lists, please email them,
- use proper email subjects,
- do not be aggressive if you read something you do not like, calm down, count to 100 and lets talk again when you are relaxed,
- do not apply passive aggression as your communication strategy, and
- do not make me repeat myself.
i wrote all above so i avoid being an arrogant and unapproachable asshole. point is to make it easier for you and for me to learn more about each other and achieve what we are working for and have more fun. i suggest that you also write your own rules and email them to me and i will do my best to respect it.
again, i realize this could be bizarre to ask of people to follow these rules blindly. i will not punish anyone for making mistakes. this is not a prison or even worst, high school. these rules are a guide to make it easier. if you can follow it great, if not, well try at least.
i love you anyway.